Another day, still dark at this time.  I've decided not to swim twice a week, but to run and bike 1 1/2 times a week and swim once. Long Bike-Short Run-Medium Bike-Long Swim / Long Run-Short Bike-Medium-Long Swim run. That will be better. I'll get more bank for the buck that way. I don't think the drills will improve my performance in the swimming more than the training for biking and running will help me go further.  That's that and it will be good.  Yeah.  Except I can't go running now. I'll have to do that in the afternoon since it's dark now. It will be warmer anyway and that will be good. Life is good. Life marches on. Mom and dad are at rest and rid of their suffering. I think dad's worse suffering was the headaches and everything else was just frustration in being less able to do things and being less independent which is a state of mind. It was a sense of suffering, but something that could be overcome but he wasn't able to. Hopefully, my spirituality will enable me and give me tools to cope with it. Easier to let go of things. Amen. There is a cat out there I think that is unhappy or some sick animal. I hope if it's a cat that the owner will get. I hope they don't treat it as an outdoor cat if it can't handle the cold. If it's a sick wild animal I hope it gets better or passes in peace and that it doesn't hurt anyone. Life goes on and it is starting to get a semblance of stability and approaching a new normal. That is good and I can move more towards a more loving life helping others. I want to be active in social justice politics at least sending letters to government officials and taking part in marches and such. My todo list is getting more manageable and also there's that State Farm volunteer page. I hope it's still there, but that my mom talking. Go with, yes, it's there and I will find activities to help others. If it turns out it's not there, then I'll find another path. But, having doubt will not help me. I have fear of failure because things won't turn out like I expect or want, but that is okay. I am smart and strong and get handle the unexpected. It will all turn out fine even if I don't see where it will end up. There is not absolute way things are supposed to turn out. That is part of the beauty and the wonder of the universe. It all turns out like an amazing creative journey and experience. Thank you Lord for the experience and may we all find the love in our creation to share and experience that brings joy to one another. Amen. (481)